Thread: Flirting Guide

I've collected these from friends, myself, people on forums and websites.
So many people ask for flirting tips, they don't often get detailed responses so here they are. It's written in the female point of view, but most of the tips work just a well for guys (just masculinize them--lol)

1) Be Open - Approach everyone you meet with a smile. Let your face show that you're interested in what people are saying. Let your natural enthusiasm shine through. Look people in the face and show them you are happy to meet them.

2) Be Honest - Nobody likes a phony. People can spot insincere praise and faked interest right away. Just being yourself is your best bet for flirting success. If you are open to others, they will be able to sense it.

3) Be Spontaneous - Don't think too hard about what you're going to say - just really listen to what the other person is saying and let yourself respond naturally. Don't worry about what might happen next - live for the moment! You might not get another chance to talk to the person! So go for it!

4) Smile - You can't hear this often enough! A smile makes you look friendly, confident and approachable. People smile at people who smile! So smile! It's contagious!

5) Make Eye Contact - When talking to a guy, make sure you have good eye contact. You don't have to stare! But don't look all around the room, either, or he'll think you're looking for someone more interesting to hang out with. Let him know with your eyes that he is the person you would most like to be talking to.

6) Listen- You have two ears and one mouth because you should listen twice as much as you speak! Listening is a true art, and the best conversationalists all have great listening skills in common. Your flirting partner will be drawn to you if you master this simple skill. Everyone loves to be listened to.

7) Ask Questions - Show you are interested in what a guy is saying by asking for more details. If he says he plays baseball, ask what position. If he mentions a movie he saw, ask him to tell you more about the story. You get the picture! Asking questions proves you have been listening, and sends the message that you find him interesting. Guys find this very flattering (wouldn't you?).

8) Use Innocent Touch - When talking to a guy, lightly touch his arm when you're making a point or laughing at something he has said. Don't overdo it, just a few times in a conversation is enough to send the message that you like him. If you have chemistry with a guy, he'll figure it out fast just from the touch of your fingertips.

9) Don't Argue - Think Jerry Seinfeld and Elaine Benes, not Mr. And Mrs. Kostanza. Playful banter is fine - it shows off your sense of humor and can help create a bond with a guy you're talking to. But don't try to show off by insisting on your point, or you'll be remembered as "don't date" material.

10) Be Confident - People are drawn to other people who have confidence. Confidence radiates like the sun - others can sense when you have it. It's all about walking with your head held high and knowing that if a guy doesn't respond to your flirting, it's his loss, not yours. Know you are a catch and you'll send that signal to others.

Use "Mirroring" Body Language - "Mirroring" is a kind of unspoken communication, where you copy - or "mirror" - the other person's body language. So if he's got his arms crossed, you cross your arms too; if he runs his hand through his hair, you do the same. Don't do exactly everything he does, or you'll end up looking like a monkey! But by gracefully mirroring some of his gestures, his brain gets the subconscious message that you like him. This is a great trick for helping someone relax when you're flirting with them at a party.

Whisper - For advanced flirters, this is one of the all-time classic flirting tricks. When you're in a conversation with a guy, ask him if you can tell him a secret, then lean in to his ear and whisper a sincere compliment ("You have really good taste in clothes").

Drop It! - This one is so old-fashioned, your mom probably used it. There's a reason it's a classic though - this flirting staple hardly ever fails! Walk past a guy you like, making eye contact with him and giving him a nice smile. Then just when you're passing him, drop something (a book, your bag, whatever). If he's at all interested in you, he'll bend down to help you pick it up- and voila! There's your opportunity to start chatting.

Ask for His Help - Creating opportunities for your crush to "help" you will give him a confidence boost and make him feel more comfortable and assured around you. Pick something you're sure he's good at, like helping you practice a part in a play, showing you how to stretch before running, getting your car started, or solving a problem. Devious? Maybe- but it works!

Repeat His Name - Repeating a guy's name in conversation sends a message directly to his subconscious that you are interested in him. Don't go overboard ("Yes Billy, I agree, Billy, that the mall, Billy, is very fun, Billy!")!!! Saying his name a few times through the conversation is enough - and a very effective flirting technique.

Ask Questions that Show You "Get" Him - This is an advanced flirting move that, done right, can make a guy think you were made for him. The trick is to let him know you see something in him that no one else understands. To do that, you've got to guess how he sees himself inside, which is usually different from what everyone notices about him. So aim for complimenting the opposite. Is he a jock? Tell him how sensitive or spiritual he seems. Is he a dreamy, intellectual type? Tell him the first thing you noticed about him were his strong arms. Do this flirting maneuver right, and he'll be eating out of your hand!

Give the Head to Toe Look - When a guy you like is walking towards you or standing across the room, give him a look all over from head to toe. Then flash him your best smile! There's no mistaking this means you think he's fine all over.

Use the Over the Shoulder Look - If your crush is standing behind you, look over your shoulder- and smile at him. This flirtatious move is always a signal you are interested. (Trust us, he'll get the message!)

Have Something New To Do - At a party, be the girl who gets everyone involved in an activity (like dancing) or a game (like "Truth, Dare, Double Dare"). Guys like girls who take charge in social situations. You'll seem like a lot of fun by doing this. Plus, you get the chance to think up something that will bring you closer to your crush!

The Wink - At a party, in a group of people or even at school, look over at the guy you like, smile and give him a quick wink! Just be sure to follow the Primary Rule of Winking: W.O.O. ("Wink Only Once"). Winking once is a cute way to signal interest, and he'll go crazy wondering if you really did it - a good thing. But if you wink more than once, it looks like you got something stuck in your eye!

Give Him a Nickname - The goal of this flirting move is to create an inside joke between you and your crush. Inside jokes are great for creating a bond and making it easier to connect when you see him again. Does he drink a lot of cola? Call him "sodapop." Does he talk about his car constantly? Call him "hot rod." Make sure it's something flattering or funny, and don't call him anything you'd be embarrassed to say again when you see him in the hall.

Use Props - Props - interesting items that you carry with you - are great for starting conversations with cute guys. The best props are interesting enough that guys will not be able to help themselves from coming over to talk to you about them. Don't leave home without your props! Great props include a T-shirt with a funny message, a really funky pair of shoes, a fabulous scent, unusual sunglasses, bright neon lipstick or nail polish, interesting jewelry, a great hat, or a cool magazine or book.

Message Oh and many ask how to know if a guy likes u: well every guy is diffferent, so nothing's for sure but this helps:
How to Tell if a Boy Likes You... Some Clues:

* He might start talking loudly in your presence or start treating you as one of the guys. (Yes, this is a weird way to show he likes you, but it's one of the most common and strongest signals!)
* He might also become very shy and mumble when he speaks to you.
* Then again, he could behave like a real Casanova, praising you for no apparent reason and straining hard to hold a sustained intelligent conversation (often ending in him asking for your phone number or for a date)

* If he is acting more flirtatious toward you than toward other people at the same event
* If his friends are paying attention to you when he isn't around (often a clue that this guy talked to his or her friends about you).
* If he always seems to be around (especially if you get the "instinct" that he's there because of you)
* If he is smiling while listening to you, and seems to be listening especially "actively"
* If he seems to look into your eyes a little longer than normally.
* If he remembers stuff you said before and brings it up again (asking questions about something you mentioned in the past ) - shows he's interested in you

Testing Your Suspicions:
If you think a guy likes you (trust your gut instinct, girls) but you can't be totally sure, try this: Give him your best smile. If he smiles back, or his face suddenly lights up, tah dah! He likes you. If he starts sweating and looks all flustered, he likes you even more. If his smile is the polite kind, or if he frowns or looks away, that's a bad sign that maybe he isn't interested in you after all.

How to tell she likes you:



She gazes in your eyes with deep interest and her pupils are dilated.

Her skin tone becomes red while being around you.


Her crossed leg is pointed towards you or if that same leg is rocking back and forth towards you.

She raises or lowers the volume of her voice to match yours.

She rubs her chin or touches her cheek. This indicates that she's thinking about you and her relating in some way...

She winks at you while talking to you or winks at you from a distance.

She exposes the palms of her hand facing you.

Biting of the lips or showing of the tongue, licking her lips or touching of her front teeth....


She starts sitting straight up and her muscles appear to be firm.

She puts her fingernail between her teeth.

She laughs in unison with you.

She touches your arm, shoulder, thigh, or hand while talking to you.

Plays with her jewelry, especially with stroking and pulling motions.



She twirls her hair around her fingers while she is looking at you.


Eyebrows raised and then lowered, then a smile usually indicates interest in you.

While talking to you, she rest an elbow in the palm of one hand, while holding out her other hand, palm up.

In a crowd she speaks only to you and focuses all of her undivided attention on you.

While talking to you, she blinks more than usual, fluttering her eyelashes.
ig smiles with upper and lower teeth showing with a relaxed face.

She speeds up or slows down her speaking to match yours.

She rubs her wrists up and down.

How to tell if he likes you
(and if he's flirting with you in his special own guy-way).

A lot depends on the type of guy and his individual personality.

Shy Guys
These are tough to crack sometimes...
He'll look at you, until you turn around, then boom, he's looking the other way.
You may 'feel' like he's watching you - but he's hard to catch at it
He may do something physical - like grab you in a play way, poke you, play with your hair...
(Remember when you were really young and the guy you liked punched you or tackled you?)
He may be working really hard to pay attention to you, but doesn't quite know how...
He may ask a friend of yours about you - he'll say it's just for "friend of mine" that wants to know about you.
He talks to everybody else - but when you're around he turns silent, or chokes up.
You seem to accidentally bump into him a lot of different places.
He may not say a word to you, but he shows up in the same line, at the same movie, etc.
He'll give you a little smile from across the room, but if you get near, he won't look up.
Basically - the BIG clue is that his behavior changes when you're around (compared to when he's around his buds or other girls).
DEAD Giveaway - when you talk to him he turns red.
(Bingo - you can pack that puppy up and take him home...)





-good luck- By the way, some people are just natural flirts. Some just flirt with EVERYONE, whether they know it or not, whether they're attracted to them or not. Others just have an easewith it. Others need to make an effort to flirt, it's not part of their nature. Nothing must be forced: the person will be able to tell if you try too hard.