Thread: You Know When You are South African When...

* You produce a R100 note instead of your driver's licence when stopped
by a traffic officer.

* You can do your monthly shopping on the pavement.

* You have to hire a security guard whenever you park your car.

* You can count the national soccer team's scores with no fingers.

* Hijacking cars is a profession.

* You can pay your tuition fees by holding up a sign at a traffic light.

*The petrol in your tank may be worth more than your car.

* More people vote in a local reality TV show than in a local election.

* People have the most wonderful names: Christmas, Goodwill, Pretty,
Wednesday, Blessing, Brilliant, Gift and Given

* "Just Now" can mean anything from a minute to a month.

* A bullet train is being introduced but we can't fix potholes.

* The last time you visited the coast you paid more in speeding fines
and toll fees than you did for the entire holiday.

* You paint your car's registration number on the roof.

* You have to take your own linen with you if you are admitted to a
government hospital.

* Prisoners go on strike.

* Workers strike to eradicate unemployment and poverty (instead of working).

* You are the criminal because you have apprehended a person who has
climbed over the two metre wall with bladed wire around your property,
poisoned your dog, broken your window, disarmed your alarm system and is
busy trying to open your safe behind your bedroom door at three 'o clock
in the morning.

* When your car is stolen the police asks you whether you want them to
investigate the theft. Then if you say yes they tell you it's not going
to do any good. Then the government extols the hard work and dedication
of the police force.

* Prominent businessmen who are in control of millions of shareholders'
money visit the sangoma to tell them how to vote in Board decisions.

* Job appointments are made according to demography, skills or knowledge
or experience or education are secondary.

:wub: