Thread: Happy here, happy now

Happy here, happy now

What does it mean to be happy? Having money, cars, sex and a good job? What combination of this is “just enough” to make you happy? If these things truly bring happiness then was it impossible to be happy before the invention of money, cars and all the other material things we treasure in our lives? Maybe it’s that girl you’ve been eyeing all year. If you could just have her in your life things would be perfect. Most of us believe things like this before having even met the person, let alone go on a date with them.

We disillusion ourselves constantly believing that “this” or “that” will bring us happiness. Some of us know it is only temporary happiness, but it’s good enough for us. If I’m happy now that’s all that matters. Ironically, taking this approach to happiness actually creates suffering in our life. We search around for something to make us happy now, but if we cannot find it then we are left feeling sad and depressed. Most people believe this is the only way to find happiness. You need to acquire something “out there”, even though it is temporary, to be happy.

However, true happiness is not like this. True happiness is eternal. It doesn’t fluctuate. It can stand up against anything. In general, people don’t believe that such happiness exists. We are so use to a base level of happiness. Everyone seems to have a different idea of what happiness really is, but true happiness cannot be this way. It cannot be different and come in various forms. Something that is eternal is permanent and unchanging.

What is happiness then? In one word, it is “awareness”. Being present in this moment can settle your heart and mind. When we choose to stay in this present moment we are no longer grasping at something “out there”. We are only grasping when we are dwelling in the past or future. That is all life is. It’s is merely a series of moments. The future is just an illusion. So is the past. Your life can be taken away at any moment. Therefore, all you need to do is be present to be happy.

If this is real happiness, which seems rather simple, then why aren’t there more happy people in this world? Well, it takes courage to let go of our common understanding of happiness. Most people cannot let go of the idea that happiness does not involve “having”. Happiness is not about acquiring anything. It’s about letting go. Once we let go of our common notion of happiness, we can then find real happiness.

The courage comes from questioning society’s norm or what the media tells us what “happiness” is. Our notion of happiness is heavily influenced by the media. Someone who lives in an African tribe could not possibly understand an American’s idea of happiness. This is because the two of them were brought up in different environments and fed different images of what happiness is. We need to be aware of this and question what we are being told. Otherwise, we become disillusioned and start chasing after this image of happiness that has been implanted inside our heads.

Companies spend millions and millions of dollars on advertisements trying to disillusion us. Beer ads usually have young and beautiful women dancing, drinking and having a good time. However, these beer companies never show the people who go to AA because they have a drinking problem. We are fed half truths. The media shows us what we want to see instead of how things really are. Through constant exposure these images become ingrained in our heads. Sooner or later we associate getting drunk or doing drugs with a sense of care free happiness. However, we are actually just buying into our disillusioned minds. We are falling victim to the “invisible forces” that push products on us in their endless pursuit to increase profits. Those funny ads are not there to make you laugh. They’re there for one reason: so you consume. The unfortunate consequence of all this is that the idea that “getting stuff” or “consuming” will bring us happiness is constantly being reinforced through advertisements. It has gotten ridiculous. Just look at the life of a common American. Clearly, this road does not lead to true happiness.

What about death and all the suffering that goes on in the world? How can we be happy in the face of all this madness? In a sense, life is filled with hardship. Your mother will die, you might get cancer, and eventually you will die and so on. However, most of this hardship is created in our own minds. We hold onto this notion of self. When we get punched in the arm we think “I’ve” been hurt. We become protective of this “self” and wish it no harm.

However, we cannot escape the fact that we will eventually die. Yet, the whole notion of death is based on the idea what we have a “self”, something that is extinguished. What basis do we really have for our notion of self? Are you really some separate entity living in the world? Isn’t life really just a series of moments where there is constant flux and change? There really is no basis for our notion of self. Once we realize this death is no longer something we fear.

Again, it comes down to awareness and examining your life for yourself. Ultimately, you are the final judge on your life. It is not a matter of agreeing or disagreeing with me but instead, examining your life for yourself and making your own conclusions. If you feel that happiness is one thing then continue to pursue your idea of it, but constantly be aware and question why you are doing what you are doing. Too many of us go through life without thoroughly examining it. In the end, I hope you find happiness.

Great essay, Digity.

Happiness to me? Being connected to someone(s) on a deeper level keeps me content. Knowing you're not alone in this big mean world. Just sitting down over a nice cup of coffee or whatever, and sharing your problems/storys/'how your day was' with someone who cares. That's happiness.

I'm not the best with words, so if that made sense, kool.