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Reply With QuoteBad idea. Very bad idea. Exposure to long term legal risk in an unstable situation.
My friend Jon has been going out with this girl for I'd say about 9-months. They met doing a Masters course in London. She's American and he's English. They fell for each other and Jon left his ex to be with her. Now they've both finished their courses and her visa has run out. So.... she's asked him to marry her so she can stay in the UK.
I think this is a veeeeeery bad idea. Sure, marry a friend or whatever to get the visa, but to marry someone you're in a relationship just to get a visa strikes me as very foolish indeed. To add to this, she's also on Citalopram which is an anti-depressant. I've let him know it's a bad idea and he's taking some time to think about it but at the same time he's pretty excited at the fact she asked him. I think it'll all end in tears. What about you?
The broad masses of a nation are always more easily corrupted in the deeper strata of their emotional nature than consciously or voluntarily; and thus in the primitive simplicity of their minds they more readily fall victims to the big lie than the small lie, since they themselves often tell small lies in little matters but would be ashamed to resort to large-scale falsehoods. It would never come into their heads to fabricate colossal untruths, and they would not believe that others could have the impudence to distort the truth so infamously. Even though the facts which prove this to be so may be brought clearly to their minds, they will still doubt and waver and will continue to think that there may be some other explanation. For the grossly impudent lie always leaves traces behind it, even after it has been nailed down, a fact which is known to all expert liars in this world and to all who conspire together in the art of lying. These people know only too well how to use falsehood for the basest purposes... Adolf Hitler
Bad idea. Very bad idea. Exposure to long term legal risk in an unstable situation.
Your mind can only hold one thought at a time. Make it a positive and constructive one.
~ H. Jackson Brown Jr.
Pre-nup at the very, very least.
Pre-nup, lawyer up, get married in New York.
"Hic puer est stultissimus omnium."
sorry for my laziness for not googling it up and not knowing, what is a pre nup? is it anything like marriage?
When it comes to pink butterflies i could give a flying fuck.
Not the smartest thing, but look at all the failed crappy marriage that are for the right reasons. Never know how things will turn out. This could wind up going fine for them, or could wind up turning to shit. You never know. You live and learn- but yeah, he should be smart about this, pre-nup at least.
its a contract that you make with your partner in order to make sure your um assets are safe if the marriage goes to shit... example: car house money um alimony etc.Originally Posted by Greaser
Zerosum
Not sure that a pre-nup really makes sense. They're not recommended unless you're worth at least a million dollars.
Yeah, it's probably a mistake. But people are going to do what they want regardless of the input they receive from others. Especially if they're not asking for advice.
10:21 PM [TheMadCatter] I got free shipping, 20 dollars off, and a free tote bag12:26 AM [smirk] i think blended margaritas taste good sometimes(11:44:55 PM) Onionman: I was watching oprah...Personman says (3:16 AM):So I'm not girl like enough for you?
pre nups just a way of protecting yourself from someone your not really sure about it doesnt matter if you have alot of money or not if i worked for 10 years and saved up 10,000 then got devorced the lil money i had would be alot to me.. then what 100 bucks for everything you own is a pretty good insurance policy
Zerosum
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i fail to see what the big problem is, personally... but i don't put a lot of stock in the whole "marriage" thing. outside of the legal perks- tax filing status or health care benefits or this kind of situation.
it makes a lot of sense to me. would she maintain citizenship status after they get divorced?
'Cause I'm that fool that broke the key- I'm unlockable so don't check me- I got weight on my shoulders and things on my mind- The sky is falling and I'm falling behind... No shame in my game just par for the path- I try to hone my craft because at hand's the task- But I find I'm not playing with a full deck- I'm up to my neck like Toulouse Lautrec
Not sure about maintaining citizenship after divorce. But besides, getting married doesn't just grant you a UK visa. Another of my friends (well, more my girlfriend's friend) had an online relationship with some mad girl in the USA and went over for a stupidly expensive booty-call and ended up getting married after two days (I can't help but laugh and call him a pathetic loser in my head every time I think of this) and then she came over hoping to like in the UK. But the border guards sent her back because she didn't have a job lined up or anything.
I just don't think it's a good idea marrying someone you're in a relationship with when said relationship is still relatively new, oh and they almost broke up a few weeks ago.
The broad masses of a nation are always more easily corrupted in the deeper strata of their emotional nature than consciously or voluntarily; and thus in the primitive simplicity of their minds they more readily fall victims to the big lie than the small lie, since they themselves often tell small lies in little matters but would be ashamed to resort to large-scale falsehoods. It would never come into their heads to fabricate colossal untruths, and they would not believe that others could have the impudence to distort the truth so infamously. Even though the facts which prove this to be so may be brought clearly to their minds, they will still doubt and waver and will continue to think that there may be some other explanation. For the grossly impudent lie always leaves traces behind it, even after it has been nailed down, a fact which is known to all expert liars in this world and to all who conspire together in the art of lying. These people know only too well how to use falsehood for the basest purposes... Adolf Hitler
From bad to worse. An unstable relationship to begin with should not proceed with marriage. It's not only foolish, it's down right stupid.
Your mind can only hold one thought at a time. Make it a positive and constructive one.
~ H. Jackson Brown Jr.
100 bucks? Do you really think that's how much it costs? The lawyer that I recently retained to handle my dad's estate charges $270 per hour and that doesn't include the fees to file the paperwork. Prenups average about $800-$3k to set up. They're only recommended for certain situations and I'm not sure $10k warrants one, but to each their own.
I've always said that I need to be in a relationship with someone for 3 years before we get married.
10:21 PM [TheMadCatter] I got free shipping, 20 dollars off, and a free tote bag12:26 AM [smirk] i think blended margaritas taste good sometimes(11:44:55 PM) Onionman: I was watching oprah...Personman says (3:16 AM):So I'm not girl like enough for you?
Why three years in particular?
I can't answer for Aimee, however it's funny she said that. I decided that if I ever had to do this again (which hopefully I won't!) that three years is my magic number, too.
For us - the first year was kind of the 'honeymoon,' the second year was rough. Honey moon period ended - we were learning all the really annoying things about each other that we hadn't noticed before, fighting often, figuring out communication issues, etc. The third year was learning to live with all of that and seeing if it could be done happily. After the third year things got much, much better.
My relationship before this one also ended right around the three year mark. For both of my serious relationship, that third year was a very telling year.
I also remember when my cousin and her boyfriend lived with us. That whole year for them was tough. They made it through and came out of it well and I remember her telling me "If you can make it through the third year, you'll be okay!"
As for Brew's friend - definitely a stupid idea, however I am in a relationship where we did everything we shouldn't have; so, never say never I guess.
I love all the things that we should fear, and Im not afraid of being here....
Take your records, take your freedom, take your memories I dont need 'em
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